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#1

cali

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I'm listening to  Tomppabeats  and  Atlas as I make this, won't be linking them.

#1.

Hey, what's up. My name is pxy, bq, whatever you wanna call me. Keep it appropriate, though.

This is "me, even though i'm only 13", some kind of blog I just decided to create where you can get an insight to my daily life.

Why? Well, as a pasttime, I like to write stories. All of them are scrapped, but I basically write or listen to music in my free time.

Now, let's make a disclaimer;

In a lot of these entries, I will talk about my personal feelings, and what I think and do on a daily basis. Some of these things may be upsetting or may give an "attention-seeking cunt" kinda vibe. So, let's clear this up; I actually hate attention. When people worry for me, it only causes anxiety and some other fucked up feelings. So, I don't want attention. I'll call this, an alternate way of venting when I need to.

-----------

Friday, the day of the week where we all settle down, have a wank do whatever you want, boil the kettle, get fat without feeling bad, the sort of stuff. As for me, I treat it like a normal day, and I know for a fact that I'm not the minority in this situation. Friday, at least in my opinion, is just another day of the week. Coming home from school is somewhat a relief, as I don't have it for the next 2 days, but, still, it's another day of the week. School was basically a drag. Felt lonely through most of the day, even though I could feel a presence of my "friends" around me. I have a way of hiding what I actually feel, as if it's a kind of protective barrier. Public socialising, and socialising in general, is not my thing, whatsoever. I get on fine, but I hate every second of it. I only really feel comfortable around 2 people, really. Maybe I'm wrong. Me, and her. We'll get onto that later.

But, shit, it's been a hell of a week, like always.

I can't say it's been eventful, but every week is a hell of a week, anyway.

Full of emotion, shit you might regret later, the sort.

Now, since I'm in Year 9 (UK Applicable), this seems to be one of the most important years of my life. so, as expected, stress walks into the room. "Sup, pxy?"  Like, end game af when stress decides to show it's face again. And, on top of regular depression, breakdowns, all of those "bleugh" subjects, I can't say it particularly helps. Then again, no one can really say that it helps.

I had this blog pictured in my head today, and phased out from class countless times purely thinking of what I was going to write. And, at this point, I'm winging this all, literally just thinking of what's happened recently, without trying to focus too much on what I feel, even though I did say that I'd be saying what I thought and did throughout the week. This is only the first entry, an introduction, lets say, to this blog (me, even though im only 13 if you forgot already.).

Ah, yeah.

I haven't played Garry's Mod in about a month, I've been helping a friend out with some shit. Stuff gets to me too much, and I was always told that I will never be valued less than my position is valued, so these haitus' are always welcomed. So, I took the opportunity to fix myself and took one.

It's been going fine, but as always, I fucking miss the place. I'll come back soon, probably. As for now, this is my way of making an active contribution to the community, I guess. 

Eh, let's see what happens.

See you when I next post.



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